Rados\u0142aw Wo\u0142\u0105sewicz, personal coach and therapist:<\/strong> Let\u2019s start with a key word, one that is slightly out of fashion \u2013 love. Specifically, we must distinguish it from infatuation, as that is where the trouble begins. Most people confuse these two states. Infatuation is a powerful, euphoric feeling, like a mild intoxication. We feel “chemistry” and say, “I\u2019ve never felt anything like this,” or “This is the one.” It is a beautiful experience that nature gave us to bring us closer, but biologically, it remains a transitional state, similar to an emotional disorder or a narcotic high. It must pass \u2013 and it does, on average after several months. That is when love begins.<\/p>\n\n\n\n And what does that love look like?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Love originates from the mind. Of course, feelings and emotions remain, but that is the moment we make a decision: this is the person. When infatuation fades and euphoria disappears, people often start looking for a new partner, claiming that “the love has ended.” In reality, the infatuation ended, and the time for decision arrived \u2013 do I want to be with this person, do I want to care for them, protect them, and build a future with them? Feelings result from how we behave. I bring flowers to my wife, I listen to her, I talk, I take responsibility \u2013 and that is how I build the relationship. Conscious actions birth closeness, tenderness, and romance.<\/p>\n\n\n\n From my own experience, I know a relationship isn’t something you “set up” at the start and keep that way forever. We change, our partner changes, and circumstances change.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Yes, we change within the relationship and as individuals. We read different books, go to work, function in different environments, and pursue new goals. Partners develop in parallel, but not always at the same pace or in the same direction. Therefore, what they established at the beginning may become outdated over time. <\/p>\n\n\n\n I believe it is worth returning to those arrangements regularly \u2013 perhaps every six months. Sit down, talk calmly, and reorganize things: who handles what, what our responsibilities are, and how we divide time between work, home, and rest. We must also remember flexibility. There are moments when one person takes on more because they have a calmer period, while the other faces a professional or life crisis. Later, the roles may reverse. A relationship is not a contract; it is a living organism.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Artificial intelligence and AI are increasingly entering our lives, including our relationships. At Holistic News, we described the story of a woman who began confiding in an AI \u2013 and it ended in divorce. Then there are AI chats instead of professional therapy, perfect photos on social media, and generated responses in messengers. Are we entering a new era where we seek support in technology rather than in another human being?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n There have also been cases where conversations with artificial intelligence ended in tragedy \u2013 the loss of life. This shows it is not an innocent toy. I think of AI like a food processor. In the hands of a good chef, the processor helps make a great soup. In the hands of someone who has no idea about cooking, it can make a mess. But that doesn’t mean the processor is bad. It only amplifies the intentions of the person using it. <\/p>\n\n\n\n If someone talks to an AI and gives a clear message \u2013 “the stability of my marriage is important to me, I want to save my relationship” \u2013 the answers will revolve around that goal. But if “I” dominates the conversation \u2013 “my injury,” “my suffering,” without a broader context or the partner’s perspective \u2013 the AI reinforces that image and helps “escape the problem.” Often, this happens through the breakdown of the relationship. When a couple with problems goes to marriage therapy, the therapist hears both sides. Artificial intelligence will never replace a human being.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Dating apps have become the most popular way to find a partner today. However, uncertainty arises \u2013 who is really on the other side? Is the photo real? Is that person writing on the messenger, or is it an AI? What should someone looking for an authentic relationship do in such a reality?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Let\u2019s start with what happens when we meet someone only through a screen. It is very easy to fall in love not with the person, but with our own image of them. It\u2019s like a book versus a movie. Most people who read the book and then watched the adaptation say the book was more interesting. Why? Because it triggers the imagination \u2013 everyone visualizes their own world. <\/p>\n\n\n\n The same happens with online dating. We get a few sentences, a photo, an emoji \u2013 and our mind creates the rest. We fill in the gaps: their sense of humor, temperament, values. Thus, an ideal version is created to fall in love with \u2013 but it is not the real person, only our projection. Therefore, if someone takes a relationship seriously<\/a>, they should aim for a meeting as quickly as possible. See what that person is really like \u2013 how they move, how they speak, how they react, how they smell. Only then can you build something.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Since people met online often turn out to be merely projections, where in the real world can one meet a potential partner today?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n If we want to catch a specific fish, we must know which lake it swims in. If a woman seeks a partner who is responsible, well-groomed, passionate, and has a stable job \u2013 it\u2019s worth considering where such a person spends their free time. Probably not in a nightclub. Very often, they are on a tennis court, sailing, or at a training course. Eighty percent of successful people regularly play a sport. <\/p>\n\n\n\n So, if someone is looking for a partner, they should go where such people are \u2013 sign up for a class, a course, or training. In such places, you can not only meet someone but also do something together. Play tennis, sail a boat, or collaborate during workshops. This provides much more information about another human being than an app profile.<\/p>\n\n\n\n At the beginning of our conversation, I mentioned that toxic relationships are a big topic today, and the concept of narcissism often appears. Who is a narcissistic person?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n I\u2019ll start by saying there are far fewer true narcissists than the media or social media suggest. Today, the word has become a label easily stuck to a partner \u2013 sometimes it\u2019s enough for a man to set a boundary or do something against a partner\u2019s wishes, and he is called “toxic” or a “narcissist.” Narcissists<\/a> don’t always hurt people intentionally. Many of them create families, find fulfillment at work, and are admired by their environment. <\/p>\n\n\n\n They are often very charismatic people \u2013 politicians, leaders, entrepreneurs. They know how to put on a show and attract attention. I compare them to fire \u2013 they are warm and fascinating, we like to look at them, but if we get too close, we might get burned.<\/p>\n\n\n\n How do you create a relationship with such a person?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Boundaries are key \u2013 clear rules and consistency in following them. We decide whether we approach that symbolic fire so closely that it starts to burn us. And here the question arises \u2013 do we get angry at the fire, or do we wonder why we put our hand in it for the first time, and then for the tenth time?<\/p>\n\n\n\n Or maybe we decide to get burned again because we want to see if a narcissist can change?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n That is a frequent topic in conversations \u2013 whether a narcissistic person can change at all. From my experience, I know they can. Lately, more and more people \u2013 both women and men \u2013 have come to me saying, “I heard I\u2019m a narcissist. Please tell me what I\u2019m doing wrong and how I can win back my family.” These are not people indifferent to their own behavior. Very often, only when they lose something important do they truly start working on themselves.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Even if someone really wants to change, little will succeed without good communication. And here a broader problem arises \u2013 do we still know how to talk in relationships?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nInfatuation and Love \u2013 Two Very Different States<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Flexibility, Responsibility, and Shared Agreements<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
![\"Online](\"https:\/\/holistic.news\/en\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/12\/relationships-in-the-age-of-AI-1024x576.jpg\")
Online Human Relations: Love and AI<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
Online Dating and Relationships in the Age of AI<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
Toxic Relationships. Is It Possible to Live With a Narcissist?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n