When Logic Fails: 6 Thinking Traps That Hold You Back

The Need for Approval – Why You Always Want to Please Others

One of the most common thinking errors is the need for approval. It makes us want to be liked by everyone, which makes it harder to accept criticism. This can lead to relationship problems and vulnerability to emotional abuse. A more flexible approach is healthier.

“I want to be loved or accepted by most people, and I will try to act respectfully. But inevitably, some people, for their own reasons, won’t like or accept me. That’s not a catastrophe: my self-worth cannot depend on the whims of others,” advises Dr. Russell Bourne, a clinical psychologist, writing for Vell Health.

Focusing on yourself can help overcome insecurity and build self-esteem. Pursuing your dreams and values can unlock your true potential and lead to a happier, healthier life.

You might like to read: What will people do?

Blaming the World – The Mechanism That Strips You of Responsibility

Another thinking mistake is blaming others for their bad behavior. This often triggers resentment, hatred, or anger. We do this to escape our own guilt or affirm a sense of moral superiority. But when we blame others, we deny responsibility for our role in the problem. A better strategy is to shift perspective.

“Some people commit antisocial or inappropriate acts due to ignorance or emotional turmoil. I’ll try to guide them toward more constructive behavior, and I’ll remember that I don’t have to like them or stay in contact if I don’t want to,” explains Dr. Bourne.

Perfectionism and Unrealistic Expectations – The Silent Road to Burnout

Believing you can only be satisfied when you’re the best sets expectations too high. This can lead to:

• emotional stress,
• anxiety,
• depression,
• overwhelming pressure and declining mental health,
• loss of motivation and disengagement from projects or relationships.

Instead, focus on doing your best rather than being the best. Remember: mistakes don’t make you a lesser person.

When things don’t go our way, we may feel helpless, anxious, or depressed, unable to resolve a crisis. In frustration, we react with anger or other negative emotions. That’s another thinking trap: these reactions harm both ourselves and others.

Instead of acting out of frustration, take a step back and distance yourself from the problem. To avoid seeing it as the end of the world, Dr. Russell suggests thinking:

“It’s uncomfortable and unpleasant when things don’t go as planned. But it’s not a catastrophe. It’s not unbearable, and I can handle it. Things will improve if I manage what I cannot change.”

Frustration-Driven Reactions – How Anger Clouds Your Decisions

Uncontrolled emotional pain can undermine daily functioning, mental health, and well-being. The first step to healing is acknowledging that pain and recognizing that we can control our reactions. Focus on what makes you happy instead of clinging to negativity.

Emotional Irresponsibility – Pain You Don’t Control

Avoidance is another faulty strategy: stepping away from difficulties instead of confronting stress. It may feel like relief in the moment, but it doesn’t solve the actual problem.

Instead of avoiding challenges, face them as best as you can. Replacing avoidance with active coping strategies boosts self-awareness and tackles stress at its source.

Read the original article: Logika często nas zawodzi. 6 pułapek myślowych, w które wpadasz