He Won—and Then Chose Restraint. The Hardest Test Begins

Power tests character

Can you give up pride and the need to dominate for the sake of something greater? This question appears wherever power begins—and it almost always creates discomfort. Few people are willing to say “I don’t know” and ask for help from those who do not support them. And yet, history offers such a case.

He came from a poor family, and his formal education lasted barely a year. That did not stop him from acquiring knowledge that impressed even his opponents: law, rhetoric, public speaking, history, topography, and military strategy. He taught himself all of it—often late at night, when others had long since closed their books. It required time and persistence, but that consistency began to pay off. It became especially visible during his debates with Stephen Douglas.

One year of school. The rest was discipline

Abraham Lincoln won the U.S. presidential election in 1860. For many, it came as a surprise. He was not the most recognisable candidate, though he was known as one of the most well-read. A statesman—but one marked by humility. That became clear soon after he took office. He had defeated the strongest and most popular rivals. Many of them did not respect him. Some actively plotted against him.

If I tried to read all the criticism directed at me, I might as well close my office and do something else. I do what I think is best, as well as I can—and I intend to keep doing so to the end.

Working with rivals: an unexpected strategy

After his victory, many expected the obvious move: remove opponents and surround himself with loyal allies. Lincoln chose a different path. Instead of revenge, he chose cooperation. Instead of loyalty, he chose competence.

He brought into his closest circle William H. Seward, Salmon P. Chase, and Edward Bates—independent, ambitious figures who often openly disagreed with him. Difficult partners. Yet he entrusted them with key positions and real influence over state decisions. It was a conscious decision—a way to manage conflict without escalating it.

He invited his critics into power

Despite difficult beginnings and strained relationships, Lincoln’s collaborators proved effective. It required effort on both sides—and clear boundaries set by the president.

Over time, conflict gave way to respect. And the true beneficiary was not the politicians themselves, but the country—the United States.

The legitimate object of government is to do for a community what they need done, but cannot do at all, or cannot so well do for themselves… In all that the people can individually do as well for themselves, government ought not to interfere.

A different way of thinking about success

This approach—working with rivals instead of eliminating them—set Lincoln apart from many leaders.

It is described in Team of Rivals, a biography by Doris Kearns Goodwin. The book shows how cooperation between political opponents slowly took shape. It is not only a story about one man, but about people learning to act together in a difficult moment. The book received the Lincoln Prize in 2006 and later inspired the film Lincoln.

No man resolved to make the most of himself can spare time for personal contention… still less can he afford to take all the consequences, including the vitiating of his temper and the loss of self-control.

Turning rivals into a team

Despite his humility and constant learning, Lincoln made mistakes—especially in matters of war strategy. He relied on what remained his greatest strength: persistence, hard work, and the need to keep learning. These qualities helped him overcome early failures and become a respected leader.

Whatever you are, be a good one.

The story of Abraham Lincoln shows that success is not only about defeating opponents. Sometimes it depends on the ability to work with them—even those who stood against us just moments before. Working with rivals requires restraint, humility, and trust in something larger than personal ambition. But when it works, it creates something far more durable than victory alone.

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